Bruins vs. Capitals: Boston in seven. Russian machine finally breaks.
Eastern Conference winner: New York. John Tortorella moons Penguins in series-clinching win.
Western Conference winner: Nashville. Mike Fisher and Carrie Underwood celebrate by releasing top-40 single.
Stanley Cup winner: New York. Traffic from Cup parade causes Manhattan-wide road rage.
KEVIN PAUL DUPONT
Bruins vs. Capitals: Boston in six. Bruins clinch in D.C., Obama in stands to cheer Little Ball of Hate.
Eastern Conference winner: Pittsburgh. Crosby gives everyone else headaches.
Western Conference winner: Nashville. Too many Kostitsyns on the ice.
Stanley Cup winner: Pittsburgh. Matt Cooke leads team in postgame prayer service, preaching peace, love, and understanding.
Bruins vs. Capitals: Washington in seven.Remember unheralded rookie goaltender Steve Penney and the Canadiens sweeping the heavily favored Bruins in 1984?
Eastern Conference winner: Pittsburgh. Crosby and Malkin give Tortorella more to cry about.
Western Conference winner: St. Louis. David Backes is the best player you’ve never heard of.
Stanley Cup winner: St. Louis. Blues play a little like the gang that won it last season, don’t they?