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Cover your ears

Posted by Eric Wilbur, Boston.com Staff September 17, 2009 08:46 AM

This is not a joke.

“Tim McCarver Sings Selections from the Great American Songbook.”

$13.99 on Amazon.com.

No. Not a joke.

Look, see:


If you had told me we’d soon see the release of “Joe Morgan Presents the Audiobook Version of Moneyball,” I’d be less surprised than I am to see that image.

The CD has one Amazon review to date, from Consumer X via Boston, who entitles his review, “This is a Joke, Right?”

We’ve been over that.

I mute my TV when Tim McCarver is broadcasting a game. Why would I pay to listen to him sing?

Consumer X gives the CD three stars. That’s two more than Consumer X gave the Pur Ultimate Faucet-Mounted Horizontal Filtration System, Chrome. We’re confused.

The product description reads, “Major League Baseball legend and Fox Sports commentator Tim McCarver brings out the best in this classic collection, Sings Selections from the Great American Songbook. Produced by Sid Selvidge and cut with a host of Memphis recording greats (Tony Thomas, Tom Lonardo, Sam Shoup, Jim Spake, Steve Selvidge, more), Sings blows the dust off some of the most moving vintage American standards from the last century and gives new life to each selection chosen carefully by the former All Star and World Series winner.”

That’s it. Call Grammy. Either the National Academy of Recording Arts and Sciences or Grandma. They’re the only two I can see lapping this up. Hey, McCarver inexplicably won an Emmy last year. Why not? Book it.

Here’s the track listing:

1. On A Clear Day
2. This Will Be My Shining Hour
3. Two For The Road
4. There Used To Be A Ballpark
5. Gone With The Wind
6. Gee Baby Ain't I Good To You
7. Change Partners
8. One for My Baby (And One More For The Road)
9. A Nightingale Sang In Berkeley Square
10. I'll Remember April
11. I Wish I Didn't Love You So
12. Then I'll Be Tired Of You
13. I Wish I Were In Love Again
14. Day By Day

You ever get the feeling after a long day at work, McCarver goes home and watches endless reels of Flappers? He’s the only guy I can imagine busting into a conversation about the greatness of “Curb Your Enthusiasm” by interjecting, “Yeah, but how about that ‘Who’s on First?’”

Borders.com doesn’t carry the CD. Barnes and Noble.com doesn’t carry the CD. It’s not available on iTunes.

Is that a joke, or common sense? Not since the emergence of Nickelback has there been a more troubling time in the music industry.

Apparently they played some of it during Fox’s broadcast of the Phillies-Mets game last weekend. And get this, the Sporting News’ Dan Levy…he liked it.

But here's the thing – by the sound of it, McCarver can really sing. When the Fox telecast cut back from a break they showed the Phillie Phanatic dancing to one of the old classics and play-by-play man Howie Rose made the joke that we weren't listening to Frank Sinatra play over the PA, but McCarver instead. And after hearing his 'talk-as-singing' style that Sinatra made so famous, it was quite a pleasant sound. If you're a sports fan and a fan of old crooners, this album will be right up your alley as nobody in sports is as old and 'croony' as McCarver.

Obviously, Dan Levy is insane.

No, that’s not fair. Actually, we’re going to keep an open mind about this, with no avenue available to actually hear how Ol’ Croony (how we’ve always referred to McCarver anyway) sounds. The man doesn’t seem to have a MySpace Page, and a search for his name on Facebook revealed the following groups:

Shut Up Tim McCarver – 166 members

Fire Tim McCarver – 147 members

Shut Up Tim McCarver!! – 29 members

%$#@ Tim McCarver – 23 members

It sort of goes on a similar path from there.

Good news though, the group, “Tim McCarver Fans” has three members. The condition for joining this group is: “Must be a loyal Tim McCarver baseball fan.”

Harvard has less strict criteria for entry.

Get your copies quickly. It’s already 2,500th on the best-seller list. Hanson’s “Snowed In” was 20,930th, which has to have those boys prepared to kick a puppy or two on the way to whatever jobs they have these days. I just bought a used copy of the latter for a penny if only because it was the right thing to do.

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