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'Old-Time Hockey' alive, well with Bruins

Posted by Obnoxious Boston Fan  May 22, 2013 09:45 AM

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"Slap Shot" was rated "R" for excessive violence, profanity, lots of blood on the ice and brief nudity.

The Bruins-Rangers series has been rated "R" for excessive violence, profanity and lots of blood on the ice.

No nudity, thank goodness/unfortunately - depending on your perspective.

This has been Old Time Hockey at its finest. Two "Original Six" teams from two cities that still manage to hate each other despite all that goodwill shared following the Boston Marathon bombings. The Rangers have been overmatched, especially by Boston's vaunted "Fourth Line." They ought to be called the "First Line" since they're doing all the work.

Maybe the "T" can add a special "Merlot" line that runs straight from the Garden to the next Duck Boat parade.

Meanwhile, Boston continues to run on Tuukka Time. And Rask, who has developed a hard-assed edge throughout the playoffs, continued on the offensive during his post-game interviews.

Following in the footsteps of Comcast Sports Net New England's Tony Amonte and Rangers coach John Tortorella, Tuukka dropped an "f-bomb" on live TV after someone (according to 98.5 The Sports Hub's Toucher and Rich) decided to lower the volume on his iPod dock.

After stopping in mid-question, he leaned over and said: "Are you f--king serious?"

Lesson: You do not mess with the Finnish play list.

Speaking of Finnish, or finished, that's where the Rangers stand today. Bruins fans, as they are genetically pre-disposed to do, will be leery of any 3-0 lead following the choke job against Philadelphia in 2010. Of course, the Bruins swept the Flyers in 2011, turning a 3-0 lead into a 4-0 series win. The Bruins are 17-1 in series in which they've led 3-0. I certainly hope so. As long as Rask remains steady, as he's been since the first loss in the Maple Leafs' series, the Rangers simply don't have the horses to keep up with the Bruins.

That was evident every time Daniel Paille, Gregory Campbell and Shawn Thornton were on the ice. Those three, along with grinders like Johnny Boychuk and wunderkind Torey Krug have been the difference in this series. Unless John Tortorella, who when clean-shaven seems like a dead ringer for Al Pacino's "John Milton" character in "The Devil's Advocate," can re-possess their souls, the Rangers are finished.

As far as the violence and gore in this R-rated affair, it was all over the ice at Madison Square Garden. Players from both teams were sprawled, covering various parts of their face and head as the ice turned into a Bloodsicle. Sticks and verbal stones were flying all over the place.

Amazingly, little of the gore resulted in penalty minutes. Maybe Alexander Ovechkin was on to something after all.

Among the officiating lowlights:

Getty Seguin.jpg

• If one single play epitomized the craziness, it happened in the third period when Tyler Seguin fired a shot on net but his stick hit Chris Krieder in the face. At the same time, Steven Eminger’s stick whacked Seguin in the noggin. Seguin was shooting the puck. Eminger was shooting Seguin's head. No call was made on either player.

• Wanna-be thug Ryan Callahan bushwhacked Zdeno Chara in the face with a stick in the first period. Chara was bleeding. This used to be considered a text-book four-minute minor. But nothing was called.

Dan (No Relation to Mike or Joe) Girardi wound up and went David Ortiz on David Krejci, as he flooded the zone with a 2-on-2 rush. Krejci was taken out at his feet and lost the puck. Tripping? Not tonight, fellas.

• Rangers defenseman Eminger pulled a John Cena on Chris Kelly and took him down at the shoulder in the second period after a similar move by Jaromir Jagr. The elderly Jagr was called, Eminger wasn't. Something was wrong with my DVR during the game, as Jagr was skating at 3/4 speed all night.

These grips are legit from this perspective because they're being aired and the Bruins still won the game. Not a big fan of blaming the refs, but this still could lead to serious injury to the Bruins, who expect to be playing in the next round. The Rangers have all summer to recover on the golf course from any of Boston's illicit misdeeds.

Expect even more mayhem in Game 4. The Rangers, despite the reassuring words of their coach, are in deep trouble. They are throwing everything they have at the Bruins, but nothing seems to stick.

Despite the faux thuggery and cheap shots, this series has been an agonizing joy to watch. Remember the NHL lockout? Me neither. It seems like a 1,000 years ago. Playoff hockey and a 3-0 lead over New York can have that effect on anyone.

The bruised, bloodied but unbowed face of Patrice Bergeron, sitting on the bench in the third period after being cut by a stick said it all for the Bruins in this series.

The Bruins will advance to the next round, or run out of blood trying.

Don't forget to visit our Obnoxious Boston Fan blog. As always, let us know what you think. Post your thoughts here, on our Obnoxious Boston Fan Facebook page, on Twitter @realOBF or e-mail me at obnoxiousbostonfan@hotmail.com.

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Obnoxious Boston Fan offers a fun, unique and biting perspective on the Red Sox, Celtics, Bruins, Patriots and whatever else people are talking about in the world of sports. We More »
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